![\"\"](\"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/pexels-photo-3957994-200x300.jpg\")
Hey, Abbot\u2026 Hey, Abbot\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Then Abbott began viciously slapping Lou in the face for saying his name over and over. Lou said Abbo\u2026 \u2014slap, Abbo\u2026\u2014 slap \u2014repeatedly until Lou was winded and Abbot\u2019s inner rage was appeased. It shouldn\u2019t have been like this. They were like brothers. Or something. Lived in the same flop house. They were having an argument about Betty Grabble. Betty! Both men were just batty about her. And for some reason they had repeated run-ins with America\u2019s sweetheart, confounding all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But do not bring up baseball to them. They are fans but they don\u2019t understand the strange nicknames the players have these days such as Who or What, or Ida Know.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And the whole thing made many a vaudevillian angry, as the bit had been community property. But now it was identified only with Bud and Lou, who had not originated it, though with it they had made it. Big. That was the curse of radio and film. The question of just who was on first.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cPlease don\u2019t hit me anymore Abbot,\u201d said Lou. It was an abusive relationship. It would never fly today. People would not stand for it. And if they did stand, they wouldn\u2019t clap. Certainly. And if they clapped they wouldn\u2019t laugh. Unless everyone else did. In that case all bets were off. Societal pressure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Buy War Bonds, won\u2019t you?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Abbott was a straight man. The heavy. The ladies’ man. And he couldn’t take the pressure. In the end, he would become irate when Lou shouted his name at him to get his attention. Somehow he made it work. For him. Hey, Abbot\u2026 Hey, Abbot\u2026 Then Abbott began viciously slapping Lou in the face for saying his name over and over. Lou said Abbo\u2026 \u2014slap, Abbo\u2026\u2014 slap \u2014repeatedly until Lou was winded and Abbot\u2019s inner rage was appeased. It shouldn\u2019t have been like this. They were like brothers. Or something. Lived in the same flop house. They were having an...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[43,188,127,121,147,167,152,64],"class_list":["post-2217","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-writing","tag-classic","tag-fable","tag-fantasy","tag-fiction","tag-humor","tag-humour","tag-satire","tag-story"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3u13S-zL","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":466,"url":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/the-existential-whos-on-first-routine\/","url_meta":{"origin":2217,"position":0},"title":"The existential who’s on first routine:","author":"David Raffin","date":"October 30, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Lou: Who's on first? Bud: No one knows. Lou: Surely someone knows? Bud: What does it matter. This conversation continues until one of the participants dies of a heart attack. Approximately 43 years. Third Base!","rel":"","context":"In "Writing"","block_context":{"text":"Writing","link":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/category\/books\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1788,"url":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/classic-comedy-explained-for-today\/","url_meta":{"origin":2217,"position":1},"title":"Classic comedy explained for today","author":"David Raffin","date":"December 1, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Marx Brothers Four brothers find their identities through wildly exaggerated cultural appropriation. One is an unscrupulous Italian, One is an unruly and frenetic Mute pushing himself in everyone\u2019s personal space, One is a wise-cracking Southern Gentleman of no means, and the other appears normal which is the joke. Sometimes there\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Writing"","block_context":{"text":"Writing","link":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/category\/books\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2142,"url":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/whats-in-a-name-everything\/","url_meta":{"origin":2217,"position":2},"title":"What\u2019s in a name? Everything.","author":"David Raffin","date":"February 1, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"\u202aBonnie & Clyde. They put her name first. It has a better ring to it. And because they were ahead of their time. \u202c \u202aRingling Brothers Barnum & Bailey. The position of these names was chosen in a street brawl.\u202c A goof off. \u202aAbbott and Costello. Abbott had a gun.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Writing"","block_context":{"text":"Writing","link":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/category\/books\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2227,"url":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/buy-war-bonds-wont-you\/","url_meta":{"origin":2217,"position":3},"title":"Buy War Bonds, Won’t You?","author":"David Raffin","date":"April 18, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Photo by\u00a0Museums Victoria\u00a0on\u00a0Unsplash As usual the More Than True podcast is subversive rather than political. 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Herein lies a problem: Nobody puts Muhammad in a box. The Muhammad in a Box was a toy\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Books"","block_context":{"text":"Books","link":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/category\/books\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1280,"url":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/universal-robotics\/","url_meta":{"origin":2217,"position":5},"title":"Universal robotics","author":"David Raffin","date":"April 30, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u202a\"But I don't think I need to be reprogrammed,\" said the robot.\u202c\u202a\"That is exactly the kind of thing we all say when we need reprogrammed,\" said the robot doctor. \u202c \u202a\"That does not compute,\" said the robot.\u202c \u202a\"Hey, who's the robot doctor here?\" said the robot doctor. Then she laughed.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "My books"","block_context":{"text":"My books","link":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/category\/books\/my-books\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2217","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2217"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2217\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2219,"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2217\/revisions\/2219"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2217"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2217"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davidraffin.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2217"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}