An excerpt from my user manual

I don’t know if you can tell this just by looking, but I move my mouth through a process of mind control. The fact that you can’t tell this, it seems seamless, is part of the art; or rather, the magic of the act.

Up close I am life sized. This is explained in the manual, though I know no one ever reads instructional guides. But this is alright as I am also fully automatic. Please do not be unduly alarmed.

–This is an excerpt from my user manual. I know it is strange to mention the fact that no one reads user manuals in my user manual but it is a very meta user manual.