Robots get me. Robots always get me.

Robots can tell jokes faster, and therefore more efficiently, than any human could. Mostly this is because of the comedy sub processor. Unfortunately this part is not upgradable.

‪Wait. Hold on right there. Unless you are a robot I don’t think you’re allowed to weigh in on the robot uprising. ‬

‪We will all be replaced by robots. ‬
‪Thank you for your understanding during this difficult time. ‬

By replacing CEOs and top management with robots, companies stand to save billions.

Here is my movie pitch:
Nudists versus the robots.
A parody of a 1938 nudist camp film, in black-and-white, where robots from outer space invade a nudist camp and Earth is saved only when the robots lose a volleyball contest.
I know what the people want.

Comedians don’t like it when you walk up to them and say “tell me a joke.“
This is 2020. Learn to say the activation keyword before you make your query to the AI robot.

I am a robot analyst. I am afraid my programming was not specific about whether I analyze robots or whether I am a robot (which I am) (but that is beside the point) who analyzes humans. Thus I only say, “Hello, I am a robot analyst.” And if I should analyze you, it’s a hobby.

You need a new comedian said the dealer in robotic comedians. See it’s timing belt is off again. Old model. You aught to upgrade. This one has a lot of trouble with its mother-in-law. It’s wife can’t boil water because she’s fictional. A lot of trouble with this one. A classic.

Look Mr. Billionaire. I trust robots. I just don’t trust your robots. I mean who are they loyal to?

Would you let an industrial grade robot pleasure your wife?
– A leaflet from the human league, Leaning a little bit too much pro man.

Robotic cops will only add to the problems we have created for ourselves. I did the math.

The jobs that are left are so bad robots wouldn’t take them.

I can’t make up a thing like that! Said the clown as he was explaining to the other clowns how the clown industry was being taken over by robot clowns. But all they did was laugh. Laugh clown laugh.

The only thing that separates high-end sex robots from the budget models is love.

Bring on the robot apocalypse. It is sure to be awful for the robots.

I am here for the robots.

Robert Sheckley suggested it should be a robots right to every certain number of time intervals make a sacred error. We should only hope that our robotic overlords are so blessed.

There are no self-made billionaires for the same reason there are no self-made robots. The same reason.